Saying “We” Is A Sign Your Relationship Is Strong

When it comes to couples, there are two distinct groups: the “me-talkers” and the “we-talkers.” You know which one you belong to, and according to new research, the way you talk about your relationship actually says a lot about how healthy it is.

Scientists analyzed data from 30 different studies involving over 5,200 people to figure out differences between romantic partners who use shared pronouns - like “we” and “us” and those who use individual ones - like “I,” “me,” and “you.” And it might not seem like these little words would make a big difference, but it turns out, they really do.

“We-talk” was found to be a sign of interdependence, where the couples see themselves as a combined unit, not two separate ones. The research shows those who use this connected language are more likely to behave better toward their partner, have good interpersonal skills, and be more committed to and satisfied with their S.O.

Researchers say the “we-talk” shows a shift in someone’s perceptions in a romantic relationship, taking the focus from the individual to the couple. Study authors explain, “In romantic relationships, those who have relationship-oriented, rather than self-oriented motivations tend to have more satisfying relationships.” And they found it’s linked to better mental and physical health, too. Bonus!

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